Thursday, November 10, 2005


I shouldn't be blogging right now...I have way too much homework to do. But I'm so pissed off and ready to leave this stupid country that I need to talk about it. I've actually been trying to avoid blogging about Germany, because I have German friends and acquaintances that I actually enjoy being around. If I were ever to tell them how I felt about their stupid country, I wouldn't be very popular...

So this hatred towards Deutschland has been brewing for almost three years, but it comes and goes when I actually have to encounter these fuckers. Last night was a breaking point.

The Army provides us with the highest quality appliances (sarcasm) that only break down every other week. If one of your appliances is 15 years old or older, and it breaks down, they will replace it without asking questions. The first month I lived in this house, I had the dryer and the stove replaced--they were both "kaput" they like to say here. The dishwasher is only six years old, so I'm screwed. It's a German dishwasher that actually makes dishes dirtier than they were when they went in there. Sick.

About a month ago, my wash machine started leaking. I called DPW, which is the place that comes and fixes these pieces of shit. The guy came, told me the leak was a figment of my imagination, had me sign the work order, and left. Two days later, the ceiling in the kitchen started leaking every time we ran the washer (and it still does). I never knew I had such a good imagination! I still haven't broken down and called that stupid fuck back. Fucking Germans.

Anyway, I'm getting off on a tangent. My refrigerator went out yesterday. I noticed it because I wanted some ice cream, and when my husband went to open the container, it was a huge melted mess. Because it was 8pm, DPW was closed (they close at like noon). When this happens, the Fire Department is in charge (yeah, doesn't that make a whole bunch of fucking sense?). So I called 117, which I thought would get me in touch with the Vilseck Fire Department. It actually rang through to Graf, another military post 20 minutes away. I told him the problem, and he said I would have to come pick up another fridge from his facility. I asked him why it was my responsibility to come do it if it was their job in the first place. He said in a very thick, annoying German accent, "I only have four fire fighters. If human life is at stake, I cannot have one of them bring you the fridge. You must call Vilseck." So I called Vilseck. They told me to call Graf. When I explained what the guy in Graf said, the guy sighed and told me he could do nothing about it. So I called Graf. He explained the four fire fighter thing again (you know, because Americans are stupid), and said I would have to come get it myself. Now, I have a Ford Explorer XLT, or whatever the abbreviation for "Super Huge" is. I could have gotten in the truck and driven the 20 minutes to get the fridge. However, because this is THEIR responsibility, I was being stubborn. I didn't want to spend $10 worth of gas to drive to Graf and back when they were the ones that issued this piece of shit fridge to me in the first place. I hung up on him while he was still talking and screamed. Thank god for my husband...he called the fucker back. The guy said, "Ok, I will call the electrician". An hour later, we had a temporary refrigerator. WHAT THE FUCK?????

I actually work for a German company that is shitty too. I've been so tempted to quit just on principle. They change their policies to suit them, not the customer. Someone just turned in a sleeping bag to get cleaned a few weeks ago....It was in perfect condition when we sent it to the plant to be washed. When it came back, the sleeping bag was torn down the side (we're talking a huge tear, people). When my friend and co-worker called the plant, they said, "Well, you didn't mark on the form that it was in perfect condition, so we aren't responsible for it". All along, the policy has been to write down if there are any tears...Not if it is in perfect condition. Our manager had the nerve to ask if one of our husbands could turn it in for a new one!! AGAIN, not our responsibility!!!

Get me the fuck out of here.


waltoncad said...

After three years of living in Stuttgart, even the "Redneck Riviera" where we live now int Panhandle Florida kicks ass over living over there. I can remember how small and tiny our Fridge was and how we lost about $120 worth of food, ad DPW could have cared less...They did replace the dishwasher, but as you said, the original was about from 1945....

Erin said...


I'm so glad someone understands! My girlfriends understand, but they're in the same predicament right now too! I'm hoping that when I move back to the states, I can speak about Germany matter-of-factly without my heart rate doubling.