Monday, February 25, 2008


Time, why you punish me?
Like a wave bashing into the shore
You wash away my dreams.
-Hootie and the Blowfish

If it's one thing I hate, it's having my time wasted.

It's kind of like going to the doctor for your annual appointment. You go in, wait an hour to see the doctor, spend thirty seconds with a plastic object cranking open your insides, another two and a half minutes letting them swab whatever it is they swab, and another hour waiting for the doctor to come back in to discuss any other questions you may have. That's not even considering that you may be requesting a prescription refill or a referral, or wait time in the pharmacy line (don't even get me started on that). By the time you're done responsibly preventing cervical cancer, you've wasted a whole work day for a three minute time slot, spreading your legs for a man (or woman) who didn't even buy you dinner first. (Why do you think I stretch my "annual" appointments to, oh, I'd say eighteen to twenty four months? And why do you think I didn't go to the doctor during or after my miscarriage - despite many family members and friends begging me to? A precious little thing called time, my friends.)

Now I hate complaining about the perks we get as military families, because quite frankly, we wouldn't get them anywhere else. However, it seems like the system could use some tweaking. Every time that paperwork is involved, something seems to get screwed up.

We went to enroll Tucker in DEERS, the database that shows him as our dependent and allows him to have medical benefits. Being the good husband that Scout is, he called ahead to see what we would need, seeing as our case is a little bit different than someone who may have had a child naturally. They told him that the birth mother would have to disenroll him first, and that we would need a court order stating we were the adoptive parents. Tucker had never been enrolled in the first place, and we had all of the court documents they were referring to.

So we went in at 0715 in the morning to avoid the lines, and the place didn't open until 0730. I'm only slightly exaggerating when I tell you the line was a mile long.

We finally got up to the counter and the lady told us that we needed a verification of live birth, or some nonsense like that. Sometimes I wish I could actually say the words that circulate loudly in my brain. What came to mind at the time was, "Lady, do you see this live child in my arms? What other verification do you need?"

But instead, I asked her, "So what you're telling me is that we have to go to Labor and Delivery for a copy of the verification of his birth and then come back and stand in this line?" Argh.

Because Scout was misinformed on the telephone (or the lady helping us at the desk didn't know what she was talking about), our time was wasted.

Needless to say, DEERS will have to wait until I have a cocktail of anti-psychotics in my system.


trying said...

ah... deers and tricare. a fantastic combination. Just take several deep breathes and barrell thru with them!

When our little one was born his SS card got lost in the mail, they wouldnt give us a duplicate until would could produce three forms of ID for a 4 week old. The woman actually ran down the list of acceptable IDs of which SS card and drivers license were on.

Im fascinated by red tape sometimes.

Guard Wife said...

I went through quite an odyssey this past summer having my SS card updated with my remarried name...I've almost been married 6 years, but like you, why waste my time?! People know who I am.
At any rate, I had EVERYTHING the website & all the pamphlets said I needed and yet, the lady wanted 'proof' of my marriage. I finally told her that he was at work, but maybe we could call him? For crying out loud!!!
I cannot understand the mentality at all.

Sarah said...

We went to get drivers licenses recently, and a military ID is no longer proof of SSN. They'd rather have that flimsy piece of blue paper with your name and SSN typed on it. Sheesh.

Amy said...

My Army retired Dad just moved by me in Fort Worth from Fort Hood. They are amazed by the doctors and clinics here. I told them they would be suprised by the difference in care vs. a heavy military area and not.

ABW said...


I bet they would enroll him in EFMP for a hangnail if he has one and then you can get free daycare while you deal with those idiots. LOL

Allison said...

I feel you. I couldn't make the twins' two month well-baby appts because I:
1. Didn't have them enrolled in DEERS
2. Didn't have their SS cards

And to get them enrolled, needed thier SS cards. Then I had to go to the MPF (I don't know what you Army peeps call it -- Military Personnel Flight for us) and show them the birth certs and then return with SS cards and THEN go to TRICARE (the Try-and-get-care office) to enroll them.

The TRICARE lady told me that the babies actually qualified for a waiver until their SS cards showed, so the Pediatric clinic was wrong not making them appts.

At that point? I'm calling the witch doctor and feeding the babies hemlock.

Totally ridiculous. I don't understand why everything else is being streamlined but the paper trail seems to be getting longer and longer with the use of computers.... Go figure.

airforcewife said...

Oh I so feel your pain on this!

I had my youngest three kids at home, and getting them enrolled in DEERS and on TriCare was a nightmare! Without one very awesome, pushy, bald MSGT, I'm pretty sure my third daughter would still have not seen a doctor.

Give a small person a little bit of power and they turn into tyrants that would make the Emperor Nero shake in his boots.

Gypsy at heart said...

If you think things are bad now, just wait until the Dems ram through National Healthcare.

Obama, it is NOT YOUR Whitehouse, in spite of what your campaign ads say!